‘A'isha said, “The Prophet and I used to wash from one vessel when we were both sexually defiled. When I was menstruating he would order me to wrap myself up and would embrace me. And when he was observing prayer in seclusion, he would put out his head for me and I would wash it when I was menstruating. (Bukhari and Muslim.)
Purification: Commentary on Mishkat al-Masabih 546
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. All praise is to Allah, Lord of the worlds, and peace and blessings upon His final Messenger Muhammad.
The Excellence of Marital Harmony
This noble hadith from the Mother of the Believers 'A'isha (may Allah be pleased with her) demonstrates the beautiful conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him) in marital life. The fact that they washed from the same vessel while in a state of major impurity indicates the permissibility of spouses sharing purification water and emphasizes the closeness and comfort that should exist between husband and wife.
Understanding Physical Intimacy During Menstruation
The Prophet's instruction to wrap herself and his embracing her while she was menstruating clarifies that physical intimacy beyond sexual intercourse is permissible. Scholars have explained that what is prohibited is actual sexual intercourse during menstruation, as stated in the Qur'an, but other forms of physical affection and closeness remain lawful and encouraged to maintain marital bonds.
The Permissibility of Servicing One's Husband
The Prophet allowing 'A'isha to wash his hair while she was menstruating demonstrates that a menstruating woman may serve her husband and touch him. This refutes any misconception that a menstruating woman is completely impure or untouchable. Her state only prohibits sexual intercourse and certain acts of worship - not normal marital interactions and services.
Practical Juridical Rulings
From this hadith, scholars derive several rulings: 1) Spouses may share water for purification 2) Physical intimacy excluding intercourse is permitted during menstruation 3) A menstruating woman may touch her husband and serve him 4) The wisdom behind these permissions is to maintain marital harmony and prevent unnecessary hardship in religious practice.
Conclusion
This hadith from Mishkat al-Masabih teaches us the balanced approach of Islamic law - maintaining religious obligations while facilitating ease in human relationships. The Prophet's conduct exemplifies how to observe religious boundaries without creating unnecessary distance between spouses. May Allah grant us understanding of His religion and the ability to follow the exemplary conduct of His Messenger.