He who believes in Allah and the Hereafter, if he witnesses any matter he should talk in good terms about it or keep quiet. Act kindly towards woman, for woman is created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its top. If you attempt to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, its crookedness will remain there. So act kindly towards women.
Hadith Commentary: The Book of Suckling (Sahih Muslim 1468a)
This profound hadith from Sahih Muslim contains two essential teachings for the Muslim's conduct: speech regulation and marital relations. The first part establishes that a believer's speech must either be beneficial or restrained, reflecting true faith in Allah and the Hereafter.
The Nature of Woman's Creation
The metaphor of the rib illustrates woman's inherent nature. Just as a rib has natural curvature that cannot be forcibly straightened without damage, so too does woman possess inherent qualities that must be understood and accommodated rather than opposed.
This is not a denigration but a recognition of divine wisdom in creation. The "crookedness" refers to natural emotional and psychological traits that, when properly understood and gently guided, become sources of strength rather than weakness.
Practical Application in Marriage
Scholars explain that attempting to "straighten" the rib represents harsh criticism, constant fault-finding, or trying to fundamentally change a wife's nature. This leads to relational "breakage" - divorce or domestic strife.
The prophetic wisdom directs husbands to exercise patience, overlook minor imperfections, and appreciate the complementary nature of marital relations. Kindness here encompasses emotional support, financial provision, gentle counsel, and recognizing differences as part of Allah's design.
Spiritual Dimensions
This teaching connects proper treatment of women with complete faith. The believer who understands his relationship with Allah naturally manifests kindness toward Allah's creation, particularly those under his care.
The hadith ultimately calls for a balance between guidance and acceptance, recognizing that perfection belongs only to Allah while striving for righteousness in all relationships.